Today I got up at the crack of dawn for work. Slow day to say the least.
Yesterday I cleaned out my room. 19 bags of give away. 6 trash bags of trash... and still counting. I can hardly believe all of that stuff fit in there. I felt so accomplished and relieved. But I should have known.. that it wasn't all roses and daisies. Today I had the epiphany that I had to upload software onto my laptop. Then it hit me. I had no idea where it was and I had most likely thrown it away. Yeah thats where the explicits started to kick in. I came home from work and immediately tore apart my room and all the bags I had packed up. 3 hours later.. Nothing. I still have not found it and I am frustrated beyond measure. Hopefully tonight I can persuade my family to help me search for the little bastard of a cd. Pardon my french. =]
College is 22 days away.
I still have to buy my books & apartment everything, as well as sign up for many things. I have doctor and dentist appointments to attend. Shopping for a wedding gown with my sister. Nit picky things. And a last bit of fun to be had.
To be honest I'm not excited for college. No amount of swisher sweets or bud light could change my mind.
My roommates are.. well.. shitty. Not to judge.. but my first impression of them is not good and both my family and friends share the same impression.
My classes are ridiculously hard. Studying is going to be non stop if I want C's in my classes. And my parents will only fund my education if I have a B plus average.
My pyscho/in love with me ex is going to be there. -- I don't want to see you anymore. I'm just not that strong. I love it when you're here, but I'm better when you're gone.
My besties aren't going to be there. HOLLA JENNAAYNAYY AND ALPAL! I love them with all my heart.
I'm going to miss my family.
I most likely will be broke after first semester due to paying for books, food, apartment furnishings, etc.
However, I am putting my trust in God. This is what I wanted right? Yes.
I wanted independence in a non sheltered environment. I want to stay faithful to God throughout it all. I want to excel when no one believes in me.
This is the part where dreams become reality and when "I want to" and "I'd like to" turns to I CAN.
God is faithful to the end.